Hi. I need to share something personal, I can be a real prick, pardon my French, and I’ll tell you why. It usually happens at parties. The conversation topics are either a bit boring or are just scratching the surface of what needs to be said. At least according to my opinion.

So when I’m in a situation like this, my ego kicks in. I know better of course… and this is what’s happening. Listening to the conversation I am taking an opposite stand. Not necessarily because I belief in that stand, but more to lure someone into clarifying his or her position on the matter. After all, what is the fun of expressing yourself in terms of “I totally agree with that”? None, right?

My aim is to find out how strong someone’s beliefs are on the matter or how well thought over his or her stand. I want to learn. Sometimes my motives are not as noble and I just want to be a pain, but we’ll leave that for now. So in questioning the motives or principles we will have a vivid dialogue or discussion and sometimes even an argument. Part from the last option, in the end we go home enriched by the conversation and we both learned something.

Not everyone likes me for that though, but here’s the catch. As a coach I do more or less the same. I challenge your thoughts, habits, beliefs, values and what more. My aim as a coach is however only noble. I want you to learn about yourself so you can address the challenges in your life in a better way. Next time without the help of a coach, whether it will be me or someone else qualified for the job.

So do engage in a dialogue every now and then with people who do not agree with you or your principles. If you are really open to listen to what they say, you might actually learn something new. Not only about the other and his or her beliefs, no, most of all about yourself. Because you reflected on your thoughts and were able to express them in a respectful way. Have a great dialogue, have a great learning!